For those who want a gigantic bowl of cheap pho, Bodega Bistro is probably not for you. It’s a proper sit-down restaurant in Little Saigon that has a rather extensive menu which is properly Vietnamese as as well as French. For those who slept through history (or any movie on the Vietnam War), Vietnam was a French colony at one point, so the nod to this aspect of history is perfectly reasonable although rarely seen.

What I didn’t understand about Bodega Bistro was the name as it seems to be a blending of the Spanish “bodega” meaning “wine cellar and “bistro” from French for well, “bistro” which made little sense despite their having a strong wine selection. As it turns out, “bodega” is apparently from “bo-de-ga” which is “beef-lamb-chicken” in Vietnamese, albeit more formally written “bò” “đẻ” “gà”, except that “đẻ” means tongue (or a number of other things depending on the accents), so I don’t know what the actual deal is, which makes sense given I don’t know Vietnamese whatsoever.

All of your TenderAuthors were eating out at this one and seeing as how myself and evarels were very early, stubbornly hungry, and despite hiphapa’s arriving at the actual time, we piggishly ordered of the rolls to gnaw on before she arrived, which were might tasty. Guilt of pre-ordering prior to group assemblage as charged.

Of course, once all seated, we ordered up properly and someone (hiphapa) decided to get the squab. Now, I grew up butchering pigs, cows, and sheep in the great wilds of Northern California, but I’ve never ascribed to the notion that the less edible portions should be served up with the more edible. Not everyone agrees on this as the squab comes with the claws and of course, the head:

It should be noted that the squab was indeed good though, as long as you can block out the head aspect if it bothers you. The other dishes were solid as well. I mean, you really can’t go wrong whether it’s a simple pho, the more elaborate dac biet that evarels had, the prawns that hiphapa had, or a more elaborate chicken dish that I had. Chef-owner Jimmie Kwok knows his business when it comes to preparing traditional Vietnamese dishes along with well, traditional French dishes.

One thing to note in all of this is that Bodega attracts groups and while I generally hate groups at restaurants due to their size and composite drunkenness, these groups didn’t bother me at all. In fact one group nearest us was hilarious. Everyone was getting completely shitfaced on wine that the servers kept lining up to decant. Maybe if I understood Vietnamese, I would have told them to stop saying things about the ladies at our table, but as it was, they were just silly and amusing as well to watch. It ain’t Teatro Zinzzani, but on some level dinner is also the show at Bodega Bistro and you should give it a try if you want to have a different angle on Vietnamese dining.

Surely this is just something for hanging out at as I’ve never seen anyone eating there. And to be honest, I don’t want to rip on Yemeni’s as we do indeed like the food and especially how it’s a good deal different than Saha across the street despite their both being from the same small region. It’s just that this looks like the outdoor seating at Dave’s pawn shop in Flight of the Conchords. I half expect to see two New Zealand tourists plop down on it and have a coffee at any given moment.

This is obviously some kind of subliminal reminder that we need to get down there again someday soon to take better photos for a full-fledged review. If you haven’t given it a try, head on down for something different and tasty.

I was walking by Brenda’s today and checking on their expansion which looks to be moving along with some degree of progress.

For those who didn’t know, Brenda’s has taken over their entire building on Polk Street, including the laundromat space that used to be next door. The shot above is the new top of the building and is a nice touch. That and the sign taking up the entire front. We can only hope that soon our beloved breakfast spot shall be bigger, badder, and even more beignet-ful.

Ah, Dottie’s True Blue Cafe. If there is a food joint in the Loin that has more of a line (put your hands down, soup kitchens), I’d like to see it. For those of us who live here, we know the location well on Jones between Geary and O’Farrell because you just look for the massive crowd across the street from Chutney and next door to Shalimar. It’s an intense line of hungry, grumbly people as the wait takes forever. I have to give a respectable salute to the staff at Dottie’s as they manage this crowd well and even put up a note to the effect of, “Hey, we’re popular, but we don’t want to give crappy service. Wait and we’ll get to you in turn.” I like that.

After having visited Dottie’s after a very long hiatus from the place, I’ll definitely admit that the food is good if classic (although there usually are a couple of interesting items in their menu, such as their famous jalapeno corn bread). It doesn’t blow me out of my seat and I greatly prefer Brenda’s (although it often has identical wait times), but they make really solid breakfast dishes. What I don’t like in regards to the place is that travel writers are incredibly duplicitous in having blown the place so far out of proportion that I’m sure more than a few diners must leave a bit let down. I mean, there are a lot of other spots to eat in the Loin, but from Lonely Planet, to Rough Guides, to Time Out, to just about every other guide in dead tree format as well as online (such as Wikitravel) they give Dottie’s such wickedly high marks, it’s ridiculous.

Below are a few from a couple excerpts from travel guides that I bumped across when randomly looking up places to eat in the Loin.

This classic Tenderloin joint garners adoration and acclaim from its devotees by doling out massive three-egg omeletes, fat slices of French toast, homemade muffins…

…it may well be one of the best breakfasts you’re ever tasted. A quintessential piece of West Coast Americana.

…an otherwise heavenly food experience.

Taken singularly, these reviews might be relatively harmless and help provide guests to our fair city with one of any number of fine dining choices. But, it appears that the writers have taken a rather lazy approach and have just started to assume that because there are lines, it must be good and thus they must include it as being amazing. Given the schedules that most travel writers have to keep, I seriously doubt that they’ve spent the hours in line that it takes to eat at Dottie’s and if experienced travelers, I fail to see how they consider it to be one of the best places to eat, period.

For anyone local who hasn’t tried it yet (and given the lines, I can understand why), don’t even think about going there during actual breakfast times. Go there about 2:15 onwards as they close at three. Again, there are indeed other choices in our hood, but I almost feel like your breakfast street cred just ain’t real unless you’ve done the True Blue.

To close, I think that Jessica D, over on the Yevil put it best:

This place is okay, but the wait is far too long. I’ve been here now twice and I’m slightly convinced that the food tastes so good once you sit down because you are literally going blind from hunger.

For those who have been to France, whether it’s the atmosphere or the healthy dose of butter, there’s the solid calorie-laden fact that the croissants are damned tasty in that country. When back home (which is most of the time), I’ve found it pretty hard to find a good croissant (or most any pastry that isn’t some trendy agave-bacon-maple joke). Many say, “Oh, oh! Boulange, boulange! C’est très magnifique!” Um, yeah, I guess it’s alright if you’re standing in front of one and feeling lazy, but in reality, Pâtisserie Philippe is about the only place in San Francisco to get real croissants (or most any pasty that finds its religion to be butter-based).

There are a couple problems with Pâtisserie Phillipe. One is that it’s down at Townsend and 7th. I ain’t got no fixie, so that means I’m walkin’ and that’s a mighty far walk. The other problem is that it’s not terribly cheap. So enters, my local favorite:

Gateway Croissants. No, not Gateway Donuts or Gateway Cupcakes, but Gateway mutha-fuckin’ Croissants at Golden Gate & Larkin. This shop who doesn’t waste time with no stinkin’ website, puts out a pretty solid offer such as the chocolate croissant (don’t know what’s up with the top):

Or perhaps, just a normal croissant:

They’re both reliably good. Parisian? Well, not quite, but still very tasty. And at $1.70 for the regular/ $1.85 for the filled, also affordable, which is a lost concept in these “artisanal” times. I just wish that they were actually a tad on the smaller size as I’m not 20 anymore and one does indeed need to watch one’s figure, which is naturally tough when confronted by the other offerings at Gateway:

I’m a man and I don’t eat tofu. I’m also considered a “food snob” by friends and relatives and as I have a reputation to uphold, I don’t usually frequent restaurants in hotel lobbies. Well, last week, I both ate tofu and did so in the Hotel Carlton and I liked it. Oh, spank me bad because I liked it good.

Of course I’m referring to our neighborhood Yemenese/Arabic fusion spot, Saha. I’ve lived a very short walk from Saha ever since it opened and I never ever stopped in for a dinner. So, it turns out that last week I got a wake up call as to what an ass I’ve been. My god the food there is good. It’s every reason I pay to eat out because I’m sittin’ there and I’m likin’ it and I have no freakin’ idea how they made it. That is what you pay your dining dollars for, not figs on a plate.

But, enough about food whining and on to the dishes at Saha where evarels and I devoured a good chunk of their very vegetarian-friendly menu. Keep in mind that we’re not vegetarians. Not in the least. I think my ice cream needs to have at least 15% pork fat in it for me to eat it. But there, at Saha, we thoroughly enjoyed the un-meat offer and left yearning for more in the future.

So we ordered the vegetarian prix-fix menus that started out with a soup or a salad. We had the Fatoush, a Middle Eastern classic, and the stuffed avocado salad (pictured above) which was really interesting as the pieces of avocado were slightly fried. They were both tasty and nicely presented, with a good balance of flavors.

Then we moved on to the small plates. We chose the Vegan Knaffe and the Shakshuka. Simply scrumptious. The knaffe (pictured above) was a delicate cake-like dish made of shredded mushrooms in a luscious creamy mix of coconut, chipotle and vegan cream cheese. The Shakshuka, on the other hand, was especially cool as it comes with poached eggs and a bit of spice to it bathed in this delicious red sauce (pictured below).

From there it was the Zahara and a new rice dish that doesn’t appear on their online menu. Both of these were excellent with well-defined, bright spices that didn’t trample each other. The Zahara’s base were wild mushrooms, combined with a few other vegetables that balanced each other nicely both in flavor and texture.

The rice dish was really great as it was this clay pot with various elements to it and what tasted like a healthy dash of cardamon as well as chili. The chef (and I assume owner) came out at the end of the meal to check up and see how that plate went for me as it appears to be very new and he wanted to see what I thought. Call me an ass if you want, but getting to talk to the chef at the end of the meal is something that I always like, especially when it seems like they’re really engaged in the meals.

And at last we had to try one of their desserts, the sweet Knaffe (pictured below) that we split. Damn. A balance of a light cheese with a little bit of saltiness and a little bit of sweetness to it that was excellent and a fantastic finish to the meal together with a traditional Yemeni tea with cardamon and tea.

Now, don’t get me wrong, Saha has a good number of meat dishes as well and you can bet your ass that we’ll be going to try those as well. Needless to say, we were thoroughly impressed by this restaurant and would highly recommend for everyone to come out and enjoy these dishes which are so incredibly unique to the general New American scene that we usually enjoy, but are often unimpressed with. And for those with a fear of dining in a hotel, fear not as the dining room is a nice mix of old SF architecture and Arabic design.

Oh dear. Mayhaps the rumors of the Tenderloin becoming the Trendyloin are true? According to SF Grubstreet, there’ll be a spiffy lounge with an outdoor terrace (brrr!) coming to 620 Jones Street in September. Yes, the same Jones Street which is plagued by nearly non-stop fire engine sirens. Sounds like fun, eh? I know there’s nothing I like more than paying for overpriced drinks while shivering outside and shouting over street noise. Add in some uncomfortable shoes and you’ve got hell-on-heels.

The chef at the new joint, which will be called Jones, is said to be Ola Fendert of Oola. That’s a little fancy-pants for this part of SF, but apparently Jones co-owners Peter Glikshtern and Jeff Whitemore are going to aim to keep it upscale yet mellow. Glikshtern, in case you didn’t know, has some actual street cred. He was opening businesses in the Mission in the 90s and once knocked out three thugs in a fight. I couldn’t find much on Whitemore but I’m guessing if he gets out of line, Glikshtern can beat him back in.

My mom always got on my case about not saying anything at all about something if you can’t say anything nice. To which I obviously say, sorry mom. In reality though, you need to make sure to say how something has been done better if you’re going to talk about someone in a not-nice way. Due to the negative review yesterday of a neighboring Thai restaurant, I thought that it needed to be pointed out that Lers Ros is a pretty damned tasty alternative to which The Bauer apparently agrees: “…I’ve probably had my best Thai meal at Lers Roi.”

We went over there a couple nights ago. I think the last time we’d been was easily more than a year ago which means that I completely forgot what “lers ros” means. Back then, we ate at it and thought, “Well, it’s okay, but not amazing.” I’m not sure if we just ordered incorrectly or they got a new cook, but now, it’s downright damned tasty. You can see the chicken and basil dish I got above, followed by the ginger chicken below, with a pork shoulder appetizer below that and a little sticky rice as a side.

By far and away, the pork shoulder appetizer was the star. That puppy was just flat-out delicious and a pure tribute to the pig from whence it came. My basil dish was also good though, albeit wickedly spicy. Much like the morning after a night with a “lady” of the Loin, I experienced a burning sensation for some time. The ginger chicken wasn’t nearly as spicy and just as full of nice strong flavors.

As to my aforementioned issues with service in the previous review, I don’t find Lers Ros to have service that blows me away, but they’re quick and attentive. Can’t really complain about that. Probably the only thing I would complain about is the craziness that it seems all Asian restaurants suffer from in that they love to have 100+ dishes on the menu when large bunches of them taste pretty much the same. That has to be one of the things I really love about Pagolac as they didn’t go this route, parred it down a bit and stuck to a series of dishes that they do really well. But, other than that, I’m pretty pleased with Lers Ros and find it to be my new go-to Thai stop in the Loin. Still need to get to The Old Siam as hiphapa claims it to be solid East Asian food.

The thing about Thai House Express on Larkin isn’t that the prices are too high or that the food is bad (it’s often good), or even that their website has music on autoplay. It’s the fact the service has to be the absolute worst of any Thai restaurant in the city (or of any restaurant in general). It’s like they went out of their way to employ angsty skinny jeans-wearing art students who are working there in order to create some kind on conceptual piece as to how much crap you can shovel at a customer before they kill you with a chair.

My placement of THE on the X-List is well documented in two misadventures there that have led me to never go back. One incident was going there for a quick meal with evarels (aka tenderblogette) when we showed up as two. There was an empty table in the back which was a four person table. A group of three showed up two minutes after us and despite the fact there was no one else to seat, they chose to seat the group of three first. When we pointed out that we had arrived first, the server just ignored us. This put them on my do-not-eat-at list for quite some time as it was just so blatantly on our faces, I couldn’t really forgive it.

Some time later, on a quiet week day, I went there as part of a party of five. Once we had ordered, we noticed down on the menu that they charge a mandatory 20% gratuity on parties of 5 or more. Typically this is done to parties of 6 or more and it’s done at much swankier places than a basic Thai spot in the Loin. And 20%? WTF? 15-18% sure as that’s how it’s done in SF, but 20% is a bit excessive for a cheap restaurant.

Anyways, we ate a rather lackluster meal and they brought the bill which we then divided amongst the five of us with the exception of 17 cents in change that we didn’t think we had (they only accept cash) and hoped wouldn’t be a big deal. The server picked up the bill and the money and we commented that a mandatory 20% gratuity for a party of five was pretty steep. He just shrugged in this snide little way and said that’s what they did, then walked away. He came back a second later to inform us that the bill was 17 cents short. We all dug through the deep ends of our bags and bottoms of our pockets and miraculously gathered 17 cents in pennies. He took the bill away again only to come back in a huff and tell us that we could keep the 17 cents while he threw them at us. Stunned, we got up and walked out, never to come back again because really, there are tons of Thai restaurants in the neighborhood and much better ones nearby with truly unique foods and no bullshit from the servers. Despite getting placed on various “Best Cheap Eats” lists THE sucks and shouldn’t be gone to by anyone unless they hate themselves.

It’s Friday evening, which means it’s Off the Grid night at Fort Mason, a weekly gourmet food vendor market started recently to satisfy all the street food nuts. We love street food (actually, we just love food, and street food is usually affordable and tasty), but since we were too lazy to move our tenderasses from our comfy couch, we decided to wait for the “street food revolution” (as some like to call it) to reach our hood. According to several blogs and twitterers, the San Francisco Cart Project – the organizer behind Off the Grid – submitted a proposal to SF’s Parks & Rec Department seeking permits to employ food vendors in front of City Hall, in Golden Gate Park and at Mission Playground. And, wait for it, it’s been approved! Yay.

It’s been reported that “up to five carts” will park at Civic Center Plaza on Fridays, which seems hardly enough to qualify as a market. But I guess it’s better than nothing although definitely less than stupendous. We’ll be waiting impatiently while eating falafels from Liba’s truck on Tuesday and dousing our impatient boredom in booze Wednesday through Monday.